I dunno what to write…

I remember when I experienced my first death. I was in the third grade, and a kid named Joey killed himself. By accident of course, 5th graders don’t kill themselves on purpose. He was home alone and was playing cowboys and Indians and he hung himself with the belt of his bathrobe.

My second death is clear as day too. I was in the 7th grade and she was in 8th, and her name was Sarah. She went into cardiac arrest in the middle of the hallway after she had a seizure. That was 4 days after my birthday. That was the saddest death of them all.

My third, was last year, a few weeks before I started this blog. Her name was Amy. She was new to the Junior High, and didn’t have many friends, and was in 8th grade too. Coincidently, I had cut my wrists the night she had died, and I showed up the next day wearing all black. Everyone swore I was a gothic, but I said I was in mourning. That was a lie….

Why am I on such a morbid topic? I was watching the news and a 7-year-old boy died in a fire. It just reminded me of Joey.

This town…it’s so weird. Everyone wants to help everyone else, but they’re all so rude! Take today for example. Today was called ‘Day of Caring’, and our marching band, including myself, played at the mall for the conference. Everyone was so lovey-dovey to everyone’s face, but I saw so many people turn around and roll their eyes.

I’d like to quote a comedian named Denis Leary.

“And I know that's a cliche, that you change when you've got a kid. I also know it's the big fashion thing of the Nineties. "Here's my kid. He matches my couch."”

I’m carrying a picture of Max and Little Sister everywhere I go anymore.

I should think about what I want to be for Halloween. Well I know what I want to be. There are lots of things I want to be. An exchange student, his girlfriend, a good student, beautiful, thin…. But that’s not costume wise. I was a Geisha last year, and I still have my kimono. It’s beautiful. Maybe I should do that again.

Anyway… fare thee well.