It's his birthday. Whoo hoo. There was basically a school dance and it was 1940's themed. I wore a suit instead of one of those stupid dresses. Sure it was fun, but in a way, I really wish that I would have been sick. I mean, I felt to weird and out of place. I was dancing with Darryl ( an ex's brother and [believe it or not] friend.) and he went up to Him and asked him to dance with me. Where did it come from? Yeah, he knows I like him, but did he read my mind or something?? I never said anything!

It's kinda of embarresing that I want sex. I was sitting on the bus with Darryl and he took my tie off and started playing with it. when he was done, he put it down my shirt and into my bra, and letting his fingers 'slip'. It was nerve racking because I knew people were staring, but I didn't care. He didn't care. I can tell he didn't care because he did it over and over again. Maybe 10 times in all.

I'm confused and unhappy. I want it to happen again. Is that normal?