I must kill Darryl. He has made me so embarresed, so many times. Chris wants me to seduce him, and at lunch, I asked Darryl how to go about doing it.

"You just want me to say it because he's sitting next to me and can hear." Darryl says.

I felt like breaking into a million pieces and crying hysterically. I swallowed hard, trying to also swallow the need to cry. I'm lucky that it worked. I'm not sure what in hell is up with me. After that, I picked at the scabs on my wrists from a few nights ago. I was hoping that it'd bleed more, but it wouldn't. I got the shivers and didn't talk for the rest of lunch.

No one knows this, but on Monday, I'm taking to a social worker to talk about putting me in a home. It's odd have told anyone. Normally, if I had news such as this, I would atleast tell him or Kendall, but I haven't told either. I'll miss them, but it's not like they would care. They'd notice I wasn't there only because they weren't nearly as annoyed as they'd usually did.

Whenever someone bothers me and upsets me, I want to shove up my sleeves and show them all the scars I have. "It's people like you who are truely killing me." I'd scream at them.